depressions are for the good,at times!!!

A journey less travelled,
when travelled,will leave one marvelled!
A voyage so difficult to go..
A destination so near and i did'nt know.

What is "I" all about?
wish I spent time thinking about it all throughout;
It is painfull,it is illusory,
how do I seek in a society full of glory?

Were it the times of ill-fate which lead me to this journey?
Or was it to heal my pain or for others agony?
"I" and my body are near yet so far...
How do I find and bloom this flower?

It is intense!and one needs to leave the state of pretence.
But what is true and what is pretence??
One moment I am happy and the other I am sad!
sad for not knowing that the moment I felt happy did actually make me glad?

What does being happy mean?
Is it the dejection that is actually healing the pain?
for despiriting of the heart is where the journey again starts..
To unravel the mystery of "I" and the sorts!

who am I?
where am I?
what am I?
How am I?

selfish and jealous : lacking zealous!
but helpless and so wanting to be selfless!
An infant is not aware of the world it is said.
But is there in it that the secret of "I" is kept?

This stage of innocence was serene and true,
After which the emotions grew,pseudo and untrue..
Piling up on the "I" which got embedded inside;
Attachment and pleasure covered it like a heap of dust,so vile.

How do I discover the journey of "I"?
When no routes and no maps are laid to try!
Why is growing up so painfull,so vainfull,so dry?
Will my thirst quench and will I seek "I"?